Jeudi

Here is what Thursday holds for JET and I. I will be done law school and loaded, and JET will still be in exams.

ME

JET

Surly Outlook

It's exam time at UWO Law, and the Surly Radar 3000 has picked up a significant development. Below is the Surly outlook for the next five days. The only explanation for such activity is that JET may have underestimated his exams once again. Please see the official report below.


WARNING: SOUTHEAST SURLINESS 60 TO 90 KM/H OVER EXPOSED SECTIONS IN THE ABOVE REGIONS. THIS IS A WARNING THAT DAMAGING SURLINESS IS IMMINENT OR OCCURRING IN THESE REGIONS. MONITOR CONDITIONS CAREFULLY... DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE... LISTEN FOR UPDATED STATEMENTS. STAY CLEAR OF THE LAW LIBRARY, ESPECIALLY RANGE 3.

THIS SURLINESS WILL SPREAD TO THE NORTH AND CENTRAL AREAS OF LONDON BY THIS EVENING AND TO SOUTH WESTERN ONTARIO OVERNIGHT. PLEASE REFER TO THE LATEST PUBLIC FORECASTS FOR FURTHER DETAILS AND DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES MAKE ANY DENIM CAPRI OR JET BEING UNPRODUCTIVE JOKES.

RED ALERT CONTINUES

No change in status.

JET re-enters John and Dotsa shortly after 5:00. JL has gone to class. All-in-together-now and I are wary. JET seats himself. JET opens computer and receives an email. Anger is evident on his face. He frustratingly relays that he has received an email requiring him to proofread some peoples' names. This sets him off.

JET (angrily at computer): "I don't have time for this."
JET (looking at me, still angrily): [Dude], do I have time for this?"
AITN (dismissively): "Yah. It's 5:15"

And that gives us the moral for today. If you're surly all the time, soon enough people don't even notice.

Gradually, JET seems to calm down a little. However, five short minutes later...JET has checked this website.
JET (angrily exploding in anger): "That did not happen."
AITN (rubs JET's shoulders, comforting him and trying to decrease the fury)
JET (screaming): "I didn't even go to the speech. I didn't even happen."

And so it goes. I feel like a biker in St. Thomas. I fear for my life.

RED ALERT

RED ALERT: 3:29 pm.

JL, all-in-together-now and myself are studying in the main room at John and Dotsa. There are at least 50 people studying silently or speaking in hushed tones. Exams approach. Consideration for others is abound.

Distracted with work none of us notice the impending approach of JET. Suddenly all-in-together-now warns us under his breath but with urgency marking his words: "Here comes the surly shitstorm!"

Before we can react...JET has arrived.

To avoid surliness we greet JET.
JL: "Hi JET. You look fabulous today. Did you get a haircut?"
JET (screaming): "No! I didn't get a haircut today."

The lid has already blown off the situation. 50 pairs of eyes stare in our direction. We move into crisis control mode.

Dude: "So JET, did you enjoy the speech by [visiting dignitary]?"
JET (politely): "Yah, I did."

The attempt to placate the furour seemed to have worked. But without, warning JET continues.

JET(red with anger): "But then, in CivPro, today was the day Room 38 bit back."

As we laughed uproariously at the humour of this statement JET continued to turn redder. We reined in our mirth so we could contain the surlyosity.

JL: "JET, I don't know what that means, but it's nothing to get worked up over. I'm sure everything is okay."
JET (loudly): "I know everything is okay. Everybody just needs to chill out and calm down a little."

Ain't that the truth. I couldn't have said it better myself.

Surly Ranking...9.8/10
Surlyness Alert Colour: CODE RED (Severe)

No class today

Didn't see JET in class today. Dunno why. Three hours of CivPro occurred. JET is enrolled in CivPro.

Hence I can't judge his surliness. However, missing CivPro would improve anyone's mood so I can guestimate his surliness.

Surly Ranking...+3.6/10 higher then it would have been had JET gone to CivPro.

Working in the Library

JET is a hardworking young lad and spends much of his time in the library at school.

While at the library JET types. His typing provides a clue to his personality and may give us some insight to the root of the surliness that plauges his days. JET has deep-seeded anger that is often hidden from the view of others. However his Compaq 2190 knows that he has great fury inside his seemingly docile exterior. His Compaq knows his fury all too well, because when JET uses his Compaq to produce summaries and essays he doesn't type on the keys, instead he mashes them. This creates a loud noise that everyone in the vicinity can identify as a computer being beaten.

The anger that is at the root of JET's surliness is also at the root of his computer abuse. Give JET a sloppy wet kiss tomorrow. It may just cause him to type quietly on his computer. Regardless, his Compaq 2190 will thank you for your efforts.

Surly Ranking...5.6/10
Surlyness Alert Colour: Code Yellow (Elevated)

Long Day of Class

Today JET has a long day. Six hours of class and meetings straight. No time for lunch. That's hella unfortunate for everyone around him since hunger is related to surliness in a exponetial manner. Thankfully for everyone the always kindly CollegeBoy got him a pita and soda pop and hand delivered it to him right in the middle of his day.

What a kind measure. Surliness avoided!

Surly Ranking...3.2/10
Surlyness Alert Colour: Code Blue (Guarded)

Actionable Items: Readers are requested to email CollegeBoy and thank him for his service to all of us.

Telephones in the Library

As an update to the post below. As I was studying with JET in the library his cellular phone rang...loudly. He answered it and proceeded to have a lengthy animated conversation over his phone. From what I gleaned by evesdropping the conversation had something to do with getting a ride or having the car back or some transportation related issue. Precise times were involved and JET was at the beck and call of the person on the other end of the line.

Given the topic of the earlier post today, JET was understandably surly. Up until then he had been quite pleasant. After the call, the earphones went in and the scowl came up.

Surly Ranking...7.9/10
Surlyness Alert Colour: Code Yellow (Elevated

Ed. Note: The phrase: "I was studying with JET" means that I was studying and JETwas also in the library. It was not meant to imply that JET was studying.

Postcript: As a result of today's events, visitors to John & Dotsa's humble abode may notice there is now a sign posted, which reads: Ranges 23 through 24 inclusive are NOT phone booths.

INTRODUCING: "HMJS: How to Make JET Surly"

This post introduces a new and exciting feature.
This is the first instalment in a semi-regular feature that discusses tips and tricks teaching you how to make JET surly. Play close attention to this feature and follow the recommendations it contains. If you do, you will become a master at increasing Joel's surliness on days when he seems "too nice to be himself". Each post will provide an anecdote explaining the tip and the tip itself. Read and learn young Jedi.

To explain this first tip, I will begin by relaying a short anecdote that demonstrates the effectiveness of this.

The regular readers of JET's blog will remember a recent post that discusses a day when he was late for class and had to take a taxi to school. I'm sure you all remember the post...it was titillating.

I was lucky enough to read that post on the very day JET wrote it. I later saw JET and walked up to him and engaged in conversation. The conversation went something like this:
Me: JET, how come you had to take a taxi to school today. I thought last year when we discussed the wisdom of you continuing to live at home you said "I think I should stay at home because I'll have a car virtually to myself and the new house is really close to the school."
JET: I never said that. I never said I'd always get the car, Dude.
Me: JET, I'm pretty sure you did.
JET: *exploded*

You see, about a year ago, JL and I tried to get JET to leave his parent's basement. JET accepted the merits of our prodding but continually said that he'll "get the car to go to school every day". Fastforward to today, a year later, and he's taking taxis to school when he gets up to late because he's missed the buses that stop running at 9:00.

THE TIP: So...discuss his commute and he'll get surly. You will be rewarded with extra surliness upon raising the issue that a year ago he told all of us that he would have daily access to a car.

JET Surly Report Request to Readers: After trying this tip out, relate your stories to other readers by posting in the comments section. By sharing our knowledge we can all increase the effectiveness of our efforts. Remember, producing surliness is a team sport.

Lunch with JET

So I had lunch with JET today. Fabulous conversation on a whole range of topics: the fantastic weather, articling, friends, life, attractive girls, school and sports. JET was pleasant company and relayed that he had a fabulous weekend.

JET seemed totally happy and I was convinced. However as the day progressed I came to realise that the lack of surliness was merely a facade. Little did I know that next Saturday had come 5 days early. JET had pulled the wool over my eyes and tricked me into thinking he wasn't surly.

You fooled me this time JET, good-on-ya. BUT next year I'll know that March 27th in the Gregorian calendar is April 1st in the Surlian calendar.

Surly Ranking...3.8/10
Surlyness Alert Colour: Code Blue (Guarded)

MUCH FURY: MSN Blocking Galore

JET is quite surly today. During CivPro he blocked both JL and myself from MSN. Most appalling about this state of affairs is that we were simply trying to persuade him to spend time with his friends. Third Year Party...the last occassion for him to socialize with his peers for the past three years.

We show affection by relating that we enjoy his company and hope to have more of it. JET...he gets surly.

Must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed today.

Surly Ranking...8.7/10
Surlyness Alert Colour: Code Orange (High)